“Although I say the nembutsu, I rarely experience joyful happiness nor do I have the desire to immediately go to the Pure Land. What should be done about this? I asked. Then he responded, “I Shinran have been having the same question also, and now you, Yu-ien, have the same thought.”
“When I carefully consider the matter, my birth in the Pure Land is settled without doubt for the very reason that I do not rejoice at that which should have me bursting with joy. It is the working of blind passion which suppresses the heart that would rejoice and prevents its fullest expression. All this the Buddha already knew and called us foolish beings filled with blind passion; thus, when we realize that the compassionate Vow of Other Power is for beings like ourselves, the Vow becomes even more reliable and dependable.”
Tannisho, Chapter 9
The summer seems to have flown by despite the fact that there were days that seemed like they would never end. I recall as a child that when we traveled to my uncle’s home in Gridley I was so anxious to get there that the ride seemed to take forever. It always seemed that the ride home was so much faster than the ride there. I realize now that it was all because of my own mind that the time would either drag on or fly by quickly. Unpleasant moments drag on, while moments of joy seem to fly by too quickly.